Listening & Moral Relativism

I thought February's Ensign (magazine published by the LDS church) had some very thoughtful articles. I really liked the article on communication in marriage. I also really enjoyed the article about modern moral relativism. I highly recommend reading both articles in their entirety, but here's a few quotes I enjoyed.

From Speak, Listen, and Love:

The greatest communication skill is being an effective listener. One of the most charitable demonstrations in marriage is to truly focus on your spouse and listen to him or her—really listen—regardless of what we want to say. Being heard is akin to being loved; in fact, being listened to is one of the highest forms of respect and validation. By listening, we are saying to our spouse, “You matter to me, I love you, and what you have to say is important.”

As I was reading this quote I thought about Gavin. Gavin is an excellent listener, it's one of the qualities that I love so much about him, and one that I try to learn from. Every time I talk to him he always puts his book down, puts his phone away, or pauses the basketball game he is watching and looks at me while I talk. It  makes me feel important and loved and that what I say matters. Unfortunately as I was reading that quote I had a twinge of guilt as I remembered two or three times the past week where Gavin was trying to talk to me and I was on my phone scrolling through facebook, checking my email, or playing a game, half-listening to what he was trying to tell me. But I resolved to be better and immediately deleted Facebook off my phone (I still get on facebook on the computer because I looooove facebook drama, just not as often) and have been making a concerted effort to show my love through listening.

From The Book of Mormon and Modern Moral Relativism. The author of the article was discussing a man named Korihor who was anti-Christ and taught principles of moral relativism. Letter "h" in the quote below is one of those principles Korihor taught:

4. 
   

4. h. Those who encourage people to keep God’s commandments are stripping away an individual’s “rights and privileges” (Alma 30:27).

4. This last point is particularly dangerous, for it elevates one’s rights while avoiding any discussion of one’s responsibilities. In purporting to be in favor of individual liberty, moral relativism actually threatens one’s privilege to exercise agency by ignoring the negative consequences of not being cognizant of one’s responsibilities to others...

4. Elder Dallin H. Oaks of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles has noted: “One of the consequences of shifting from moral absolutes to moral relativism … is that this produces a corresponding shift of emphasis from responsibilities to rights. Responsibilities originate in moral absolutes. In contrast, rights find their origin in legal principles, which are easily manipulated by moral relativism.”3

I love this. I see often the attitude of "I can do whatever I want--it's my life--you can't tell me what to do" and while yes, those things are true, that doesn't mean that living an amoral life has no effect on society or those around you. I believe all the human race is connected--we are all brothers and sisters and I feel a responsibility to mankind to be a good, kind person and try to live a moral life. While my actions may not effect people in Madagascar, it does effect those in my sphere of influence and those actions ripple outward. I want to live in a world with standards and high expectations because I think it is a better place to live with those things in place.

I'm not claiming I live a perfectly moral life or that I have all the answers. Also I think this stance is easier for me to take because of my faith. The question of, "Well who decides the morals?" Is answered with, "Heavenly Father does." Those answers are found not only in the Bible, but the Book of Mormon as well. And since the world has changed A LOT since those inspired books were written (they are still applicable!) God is still speaking to us through prophets and apostles to help us with the unique challenges of our day. Do we have all the answers? Nope, not yet. But we do the best we can with the knowledge we do have.